Thursday, January 8, 2009

*Sigh* Another massive update post. My life fluctuates too fucking much sometimes.

Okay, first off - Oh my god I'm sorry I promised XXXMas postage and less anger. Well, I can't deliver too well on less anger, but here's some XXXMas - And some New Years while I'm at it.

That was indeed Lad's XXXMas present, prior to him receiving it. It looked very similar after receiving, just a lot redder.

On the second, I believe that was. I might be wrong, being jobless and penniless has blurred the days together. But hey, it gave me time to get healthy...And bored...And on occasion...

...Ticked off.

Okay, I enjoy the presence of the other girl. I need to come up with a good name for her. But she's cute, and sweet, and we get along smashing.

But there's a problem.

See, she lives at home, and cannot move out at this point. Her parents are rather intolerant of alternative lifestyles (They call her a slut for kissing Lad - They would shit a brick if they knew that I endorse this, and what I get up to. Imagine what their reactions would be if they knew of the lifestyles some of the people I read religiously have!), and she therefore has to act as a good girl in their eyes. It occasionally escalates to an even more abusive situation. Now, having been a victim survivor of familial physical abuse before, this makes me worry about her. If I could rescue her at this point, I would. I'm very much the Knight In Shining Armor when it comes to my female friends, and I have a very definite tendency to jump to save someone.


I feel she is clinging to Lad. Too much. See, she and I have each other on MSN. At first, this was nifty, aside from the fact that she uses ten bazillion icons, and I...Don't. I use an occasional smilie, because Best Friend managed to get me to loosen up enough, and then I got addicted to nifty ones. She can barely type one sentence without one. But I digress. Lately, when Lad's been working, or has had other plans, such as sleeping because his sleep patterns and his work schedule dislike each other, she has been most insistant that I tell him to get online. Excuse me? He's my fiance, if he is sleeping or partaking activities with me, whether they be screwing my brains out or playing Wii while I watch and be helpful (Or provide him with creative swears), then that is the priority. I am not going to put you over me. I am not going to put you over him getting proper rest.

She needs to find other ways to get the affection and care she deserves without interfering with the way Lad and I work together. I know it's not her intent to hurt us, but this is frustrating me to no end. And I am going to talk to him about this. I know he cares about her, but pandering to her when she wants love and affection without making sure I'm not in need of any at the moment myself is not going to affect us in a healthy way.

The Dumbass made the mistake of trying to get me to prioritize him over Lad. I don't want that to happen on the other side as well.

On a brighter note, my mental outlook on life is improving. I have not felt any urges to hurt myself in over a week. New Years Eve and Day went excellently for me, I spent them with friends and with Lad and we had a blast, all of us. I found my SSN card, so I can now go job-hunting with ease...

...And I reconnected with Techno Sex God, who is interested in reconnecting in that wonderfully sexual way. *Smirky smirk* Life, clingy other girlfriends aside, is looking up.


Tim said...Reply to comment

Concerning the title, would you prefer too much shit going on, or absolutely nothing happening?

Also, though it may be preferable to be happy (or at the very least not sucking horribly), your angry writing is some of your best, in my ever so humble opinion.