When I read the first of Essin' Em's 30 Days Of Letters (Done before her by other bloggers whom I keep intending to read in length), I was intrigued. And now I'm giving it a go myself.
One of my first crushes. It seems like forever ago, and I suppose it has been a decade and a half, but given that that's such a large fraction of my life, it still seems like yesterday at times.
I don’t remember when you moved into the townhouses, but I remember when you moved out. You were my first crush, really, and if we count childhood ‘boyfriends’ in the SO count, my first boyfriend as well.
Back then, despite how teased I was at school, at home I was a social butterfly, biking with you and all the other kids around our neighborhood. You were two years older than me, something I considered quite astounding, and perhaps this played into my crush. We’d alternate between antagonizing each other and being nigh inseparable. As I pretended to be Queen Of The Power Rangers, you pretended to be my King, and played along quite well.
I remember the time that the other girls and I decided that in order for there to be a King and Queen, there must be a wedding, but of course, at that age you at least were convinced of the existence of cooties. So they held you down so I could kiss you. I remember the time that I was so angry at you that I chased you around with my foam bat, and the time you watched one of the older kids toss one of my toys up onto a roof and I begged you and anyone else who would listen to get it down but nobody would.
I remember when you outgrew me. When it became simple antagonization, and I didn’t know what I’d done wrong but instead of riding with me and defending ‘our’ courtyard against ‘interlopers’ from the others, you’d ride with your friends and tease me, not the playful sort, but the mean sort. I was crushed.
A few years later I saw you at the mall. You’d wound up ‘gangsta’. And I had started to embrace my darkness.
Perhaps it’s good you abdicated, King of the Power Rangers. For this Queen became far too different for the likes of you.